My husband and I have this sneaking suspicion that things were different when we were growing up. Not different as in “remember life before the Internet?” different, but different as in “remember life before parents were expected to entertain and stimulate their children 24-7?” different.
As a toddler, our first son hardly played on his own for more than a few minutes at a stretch. The rest of the time he was literally pawing at us for some down-on-the-floor parent-child interaction. Okay, that’s fine. Playing with your kids is important. I get that.
But somewhere along the way in the last 30 years or so parents, researchers, pop culture and “parenting experts” have decided that if you’re child isn’t glued to educational television than he should be glued to his Mom and Dad.
What the hell?!?
For sure my own stay at home mom got down on the floor to play with me, but we’re talking a few games of Go Fish while my little sister had her usual 3 hour nap (no fair, Mom … NO FAIR). After that, my mom was off to do mom things like laundry and dishes and oh I dunno, spend a selfish minute or two washing her hair or even reading a book. The nerve of that woman, really.
Today’s stay at home parent is being told such idiotic advice as not to leave your child alone even for a minute in her crib while you have a shower or go pee or put in a tampon. It’s absurd.
I’m not recommending you leave your children unsupervised or that you don’t play with them. But children need to play on their own, create their own entertainment with the toys (or lack of toys for some) that they have. Have you ever noticed how the simplest–and usually cheapest–toys are the ones that get the heaviest rotation? My boys would play with a large cardboard box all day.
Sure, if I leave the TV on for hours on end, my kids will eventually put the toys down and gravitate to that. Humans are lazy. We instinctively economize our energy reserves. However, I quite purposely leave the TV OFF for most of the day, even when I’m working.
And when my kids start pawing at me for a little momutainment, I tell them to go play on their own. Sometimes my 4 year old actually whines in response to this unbelievably harsh request. Then he wanders off with his 1 year old brother and actually finds something constructive to do.
Like play.
About this Alpha WAHM Blogger: Karri is the Alpha WAHM who owns this joint. She also happened to write the book. 
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Nice post. There are times when our children wants to play with us instead of playing with their toys. Bit I think, we should spend some time playing with them as our kids will not always be kids.
@Patrice – I agree with you that it’s important to spend time with our children while they’re young and in fact, at every stage in their lives. I just hope that the over-parenting trend doesn’t continue because 1) it’s not sustainable for most parents and 2) it does not permit children to learn confidence and joy in their own company. Mind you, the irony is that one day when they’re all grown up and out of the house the situation will be reversed and this mama will be yearning for her kids to spend more time with her!